Don’t give me any of your attitude!

Tuesday, March 19

After Al and Kelly leave, I fix myself something to eat, and then toss the crew into the PTV.  I feel like driving somewhere.

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I maneuver us out onto Hell’s Highway and drive into Wickenburg.  I’ll get some milk and yogurt at Safeway.

First I park at the ALCO store, leaving the crew in the PTV.

I wander around and quickly realize that there’s nothing I want or need in this store.  It’s not a wasted stop though because I ask the cashier where one might purchase drinking water.

“Oh, it’s right here in this plaza, ” she responds.  She leads me out of the store and points down the sidewalk.  “There’s a vending machine in the wall by the post office.”  Gee, very helpful lady.  “Thank you, ma’am!”

I move the PTV to park in front of the water vend.

Eight gallons later (25 cents a gallon), I move the PTV across the street and dash into Safeway.  As I pull out of the parking lot I notice a beauty salon across the intersection and park in front of it.  However, when I walk in a guy on the barber shop side of the salon says, “She’s gone for the day.”   Oh.  Well, the hair gets to grow another day.

Okay, enough about our little run into town.

When we arrive home, I am shocked, truly shocked, by what I see.  Scattered about our campsite are heifers, some in clusters and others lounging, all acting like they’ve taken up residence.

They think they own the place. 

As I drive closer to the BLT, they stop what they’re doing to stare at our approach, like we’re intruders or something.  I grab my camera to shoot photos through the windshield.

I slowly drive the PTV toward the group hanging around the palo verde.

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My intent is to nudge them away.  Hmm . . . Something’s not right. 

“Oh, I see what’s been going on here!” 

My charcoal grill, which was upright when we left to go to town, is now collapsed on its side, lying in the dirt.  Not only that, hoof marks are all over the area, and it looks to me like someone purposely stepped on my grill.  I’m not one to point fingers, but I’d say the ringleader is the one skulking behind the tree with the grill lying at its hooves.

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I move the PTV forward until I’m very close to a blonde heifer and her friend.   Am I seeing attitude?  Huh?

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With a sneer Blondie moves, but . . . ever . . .  so . . . slowly.  This slow walk is obviously designed to aggravate me.  She saunters over to the fire ring, stops, looks back at me, and proceeds to empty her bowels.  She continues the slow walk, depositing piles, plop, plop, plop, in an arc around the fire ring.  Yep, that’s definitely an attitude.

I get out of the PTV.

I walk back to the BLT.  Hoof marks are all around my outdoor rug, right up to the edge!  What’s been going on here?  What?  As soon as we leave, you cows come over here and throw a party?  Upon close examination I detect a greenish slobber on the BLT.  Okay, that does it.

“All right, everybody!  Time to go home.  Party’s over!  Move it!”

rvsue

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About rvsueandcrew

Fulltime nomad
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65 Responses to Don’t give me any of your attitude!

  1. Lisa Levin says:

    Maybe they’re suggesting that you go vegan, lol! Actually, not a bad idea…

  2. jane says:

    Oh Sue, at the end you meant to say Mooooove it!

  3. Cathy Bourne says:

    That’s great, Sue! P.S. They shouldn’t get tooooooo close to that grill :)!

  4. EmilyO from KS says:

    Ah the young and their attitude against elders!

  5. Kay says:

    And how did Spike and Bridget feel about these teenagers hanging out in their yard? I hope your grill is still useable, and thank goodness they didn’t decide to rub heads on the BLT!!!! Might have to leave a radio turned up when you leave home…

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      I kept Spike and Bridget inside the PTV until the cows were shooed away. They would’ve gone ballistic.

      Last year the cows rocked the BLT while the crew and I were inside. What a shock that was. I didn’t know they were out there until they started bumping the side of the house!

  6. placestheygo says:

    Oh, Sue, I laughed so hard with this one. Had to read it aloud to my husband. Wonderful post.

    I am sorry about your grill, green slobbered BLT, and fertilized yard.

    Hope the party moved on and doesn’t return. But it made for a great read!

  7. Elizabeth Evelyn says:

    What I love is your delightfully calm, cool demeanor! No ruffled feathers or any sign of anger! Not just in the case of the bovine visitors but in every situation! What an admirable disposition! It kind of looks like you have the only tree in the area for miles….Maybe they were there for some shade?

    Elizabeth aka E2/etwo in S.E. NM

  8. Tammy says:

    Maybe the cows smelled barbeque beef on the grill and decided to put and end to that. I hope it they didn’t destroy it for you. Cows can be really dangerous. I have been on a farm with many of them and some of them have bad attitudes, so be careful. I have seen them run after dogs and they can be trampled. I’m sure you know this though. Be careful!

  9. Rod says:

    Perhaps you are going to have to add a long handled shovel to your camping tools…. And you might want to store it on the roof when you get done with it…. And yes cattle can be nasty sometimes…. Our friends wife was severely injured by one of their cows when the cow thought she might be after her baby… So careful is the mantra….

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      I have a long-handled shovel. I brought it with us when we left my house in Georgia. I figured it might come in handy if we got stuck in sand. I didn’t think I’d be using it on cow plops, which I haven’t cleaned up yet. I’m waiting for them to dry into solid pies.

      • Connie & Mugsy says:

        According to my great grandmother, there was no better cooking fire than cow plops. She swore it gave off the most consistent heat and was the best for baking bread. I haven’t read all the way to the bottom so perhaps others suggested it. 🙂

        • Joan Connor says:

          Absolutely good fire making in that dung – that is what Mongolians cook with in their gers and have been for centuries. It is a treasured commodity! Gotta’ smile, right?

  10. You never know where next “attitude” will come from. But who would have guessed it would be from a cow. Too funny, thanks for sharing.

  11. Consider it a “Bovine” Intervention– time to go vegan! Blondie is far too cute to eat!

  12. Did any of them leave a sign saying Eat Mor Chikin?

  13. Rattlesnake Joe says:

    The side of your BLT looks like it is caved in. It is probably just an optical illusion, but could this be a Butt and run? The cow with the attitude might have been testing your memory…” plop, plop, fiz, fiz oh what a relief it is ” tee hee hee.

  14. Rita from Phoenix says:

    Yep, cows and horses are very destructive…they like to rub their heads and body on trees and vehicles. One horse attempted to take a bite of my bro-in-law’s truck and left teeth marks on the hood (a new truck). Another time, horses rubbed themselves on his vehicle mirrors and broke both the left and right mirrors not to mention the mess they leave behind. The only solution was to put a chain link fence around their property cuz they live in an area where it’s open range. We have to open and close the gate to drive onto their property so our vehicles won’t get damaged. They love to chew on things i.e. fencing, vehicles, etc. Hope your BLT did not incur any damage. Make a coffee can rattle with a string attached to swing & rattle at cow, horses & wild life to scare them off…grandma taught us to make coffee can rattles. Put pebbles in a empty coffee can and squish the tops together; take a screw drive and poke a hole thru both squished together top & run a cord through the hole and tie…leaving enough length to swing and rattle the can. Make a loud noise when rattled.

  15. Bruce (Columbia River Gorge)' says:

    One of your most entertaining posts! Oh my gosh, you must have been laughing your head off..Sheila and I are at Katherine Landing, near Bullhead City. Beautiful! Windy! Loud generators (at least they shut them off at 10PM)! 🙂

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      Hi Bruce and Sheila!

      I can thank generators for making me grateful for the quiet of a secluded camp like this one. I haven’t see that part of Arizona. I love a camp near water. I’m happy you found a place that’s beautiful.

  16. Joan Connor says:

    I am new to your posts and this one was delightful. I am currently living in Mongolia ~ yep, that’s right! – Zuunmod, Mongolia with the Peace Corps as a senior volunteer. Some days I love, some days are long and some days are…well, “what am I doing here again?” days. This post spoke to me because the cattle roam free everywhere and the folks fence in their hashas so the cattle don’t munch their kinda’ sorta-like grass. The cattle rummage like dogs in the garbage and stroll the streets – maybe moving for the cars – maybe not! This is free range country and so immense.
    Soon I will be in America R-podding around the country, za!

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      Wow! Mongolia! I continue to be amazed that what I type on my laptop, sitting in my trailer in the Arizona desert, can be read around the world . . .

      Welcome to my blog, Joan! You are an adventurer, for sure. . . a senior volunteer in the Corps. I didn’t know they took seniors.

      Best wishes for a safe trip home and for your next adventure in America. Thanks for writing!

      • Rita from Phoenix says:

        Yes, Peace Corp does take senior volunteers. You can volunteer short or long term and you a choice of where you will be….I wanted to do that before I get TOO old.

        • Joan Connor says:

          Hi Rita:
          I think you are referring to Peace Corps Response because those assignments are shorter, job specific and you have a choice. I had no choice, but Mongolia has been a great assignment for me….if only I could speak their language. I am looking into
          PCResponse …. and you are never too old! I am 70!

      • Ed says:

        I did my Peace Corps years from 1996 to 1998 starting at age 53 and I was not the oldest in our group. The oldest was over 70 and was the oldest Peace corps volunteer serving at that time.

        • Joan Connor says:

          Hi Ed:
          I wonder who that PC volunteer was – he might still be serving. I think the oldest is in his mid-80’s. Where did you serve?

  17. Sue,
    One of the best things about this lifestyle is the ability to move your house if you don’t like your neighbors!
    Juley

  18. Sparky says:

    Reading the comments is almost as much fun as hearing the story today about the cows!

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      Very true, Sparky. The comments are great … funny, insightful, informative, interesting, inspiring, entertaining . . . I consider the comments my “pay” for writing the blog (plus my Amazon links, too 🙂 ) because I enjoy them very much.

  19. cozygirl says:

    Okie dokie….just Moooooooo on along! Thinking and laughing to myself, they know where the best party is in the desert…tell them, “next time bring the horses and learn your manners!!!”

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      I would be absolutely thrilled if I found the herd of horses partying on my outdoor rug! Although they probably wouldn’t do that. I think the horses would be a positive influence on the behavior of the cows.

  20. Cari in Texas says:

    Again, you’ve taken what could have been a negative and turned it into an entertaining post for your fans. Although if it were me, I’d still have been upset a little bit, especially if they damaged the BLT. When I first saw the title and started reading, I thought maybe someone in town was going to give you some lip – never thought it would come from the animals!

    I’d be on the lookout for the Eat More Chikin slogan – they have sneaky ways of displaying it LOL

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      I would be perturbed if the BLT were damaged. I’m very attached to my little home. Which reminds me, I need to get outside and wash off the slobber.

  21. Bee says:

    Just think, in a couple of days in the dry heat, you will have natures own fire starter. No charcoal needed.

  22. Bob says:

    Sue, Beware of any thing soft chewable, and/or salt tasty on your equipment. Years ago, on my uncle’s summer range, a visiting cousin had a new car with the vinyl roof cover, that the horses really loved. We had spent the weekend at cow camp, luckily he was an Insurance adjuster with his Co. back in Michigan, it was a hard sell but I know he took pix of the car in the surrounding meadow with livestock around, course horses weren’t around when needed. The proof was teeth marks to far out of reach for cows, cows will go after any salty taste, just something to watch for.
    Bob, – SW Colo.

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      I’ve never heard anything like that, Bob. Interesting. Horse vandals!

      I’ll be more careful about leaving possessions outside when I leave. You know, it looked like they nosed around in the ashes I left in the grill because white smears were on the grill.

  23. Chuck says:

    Hope your grill made it!!! Horses espescially, like to rub theit butts on anything handy. But what the cattle were relly wanting, was your SHADE!!!!!!! Funny post! Thank you for the humor!!!! Chuck

  24. Rod says:

    Rocks or small stones inside of a empty aluminum pop can will make a noisy rattle, that can be tossed at animals, or dogs to scare them away or into minding commands..

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      I’m pretty good at making cows move. My grandfather had me bringing the cows from the field to the barn when I was 9 or 10 years old. He taught me how to speak their language … “HEE-ARRR BOSS! HEE-ARR BOSSY-BOSSY!” Seems like yesterday.

  25. cinandjules says:

    Oh my god…..you had me laughing so hard my stomach hurt! I was reading it to Jules…when I got to the plop plop part…she couldn’t understand me and had to read it herself.

    Thankfully the BLT didn’t get damaged. I can’t believe you experienced them rubbing up against it while you and the crew were inside. That must have been a shocker.

    Cow puckies………..something about dogs rubbing their necks in it…comes to mind! BTDT!

    Hear Boss? Bossy Bossy? Can you explain that to a West Coast girl?

    • rvsueandcrew says:

      You have me asking the same question so I did some research:

      Why is a cow called “Bossy”?

      ‘Bossy is a general name for a cow, just as Dobbin refers to a horse and Tabby to a cat. The Latin word for ox or cow is bos, and it is probable that the first person to call a cow Bossy was equipped with both a knowledge of Latin and a sense of humor.

      Some authorities, however, suppose the term to be related in origin to the dialectic English word boss calf, a young calf. In the Teutonic languages there is a root word variously spelled bos, boose and buss, which means barn, stall or crib. The thought is originally a boss calf was a calf kept in a barn or stall as distinguished from one grazing at large and that bossy as applied to a cow is derived from the same source.’

      From “A Book About A Thousand Things” by George Stimpson.

  26. Michelle says:

    Oh my….you are funny….and really bad cows.

  27. Mark Watson says:

    Another blogger, John Wells in Texas at THE FIELD LAB has had longhorns chew through some of his web cam cables numerous times.
    To shoo the bovines away, you might try this….www.youtube.com/watch?v=tatNqy-juR4

  28. Crystal says:

    Oh, why can’t I wait to read your blog when I’m at home and not during a break at work? I laugh out loud and just can’t help it.

    Get ya a “no loitering” sign, for goodness sakes. Them thar cows didn’t know no better!

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